Hillsborough and Munich

Back in the day, knuckle-dragging football fans used to boast about how hard they were.

Nowadays, it's who can claim the moral high ground.

It's progress I suppose.

Post-Olympic Thought

I'd like to think that first thing Monday morning, all the leaders of governing bodies of Olympic sports, together with the BOA thought 'How can we improve our sports performances in Rio?'

Of course it's going to be tough. No home advantage, continued recession in our country putting pressure on budgets for fripperies like sport and the retirement of a (cliche time) 'Golden Generation' of athletes but overcoming the insurmountable is one of the things sport should be about.

One thing we have got going is the enthusiasm, interest and (cliche time again) all round 'legacy' that these Games have left GB with. Ride that wave UK Sport! Both in terms of getting athletes in at the base of your sports pyramid and in securing sponsorship for your sport from companies keen to ride the 'Success Express.'

Olympic Diary

12 August Oh, so Mo Farrah is now apparently Somalian according to the more enlightened of the Twitterati and the Chatrooms.

Some people just can't help themselves can they? Unless it's a Gold medal, won by a clean-nobbed heterosexual male, displaying Corinthian values that makes Chariots of Fire look like the Hansie Cronjie Guide to Ethics, who can trace his Anglo-Saxon lineage back 10 centuries, then it doesn't count. Oh, and if they do get through that particular Venn Diagram, then it's got to be in a sport that doesn't involve sitting down, because - ho, ho, ho and if I've heard it once I've heard it a thousand times - that's all us Brits are good at.

11 August

We just needed to harness all the things that make us brilliant. Our sense of humour, our history our artistic heritage, which all came together in that spell-binding opening ceremony. Then our willingness to volunteer. The 'Gamesmakers' are the unsung heroes of these last couple of weeks. Their sense of humour, warmth and knowledge - which you cannot replicate from a conscripted peon - has been awe-inspiring. Our athletes were always going to respond to a home environment and by and large they have done so If only Bill Sweetenham had been kept on as the Head of Swimming, maybe our swimmers might have put in a shift too. All that and the release of the latent 'we're pretty damn good on the quiet' psyche that is there in the average Briton and there you have the ingredients for a magnificent Olympics. 11 August

Lisa Dobriskey has the worst tactical brain of any UK Athlete I have ever seen, including Tom McKean. To continue doing the same thing in the hope of a different outcome is the definition of lunacy and the sooner we begin to focus on Laura Weightman (who showed maturity beyond her years at these Games) the better.

11 August

The 50 km mince Larry Grayson would piss it. 10 August    Dressage: The quintessential Olympic sport. No one for love nor money has a clue what's going on. A bunch of horsey types from a world more closed than the Magic Circle get a bunch of Lippizaners to do back flips, then suddenly the crowd (and country) goes bananas as we've won another Gold medal. Never mind the quality, just savour the quantity! Then 30 minutes later a black lass from Inner City Leeds smashes a Chinese to pulp in the boxing and we win another one, a juxtaposition that has me curiously teary-eyed. 9 August Wonder if Saudi Arabia are pleased to be represented by a a woman coming last by miles in her 800m heat, but wearing full head-to-toe cover - or has honour been preserved?  7 August Of course injuries happen. It's how you deal with them medically and then managing the public (i.e tax / lottery payers) understanding of the implications of this injury that count. Phillips Idowu has set himself up in direct conflict with UK Athletics and the whole (as I read it) 'Team GB' ethos they have attempted to build in the lead up to the games. He's been cut slack, since he's a proven performer in big competitions (and you cannot deny this). However, by giving it the big 'I am' he's given himself no wriggle room. If he knows best then great - now go and perform, forget who said what - just get it right on the big day. Idowu thought he knew best, went it alone (was still saying how great he was this time last week), spurned a well-oiled and funded medical and PR regime on what now looks like a misguided ego-trip and, ultimately, did not perform when it mattered most. Will he eat humble pie - or get another piercing? 6 August Rich Fellers is competing for America in the Show Jumping and Stambelova has fallen in the 400m hurdles. Well I thought it was funny. 4 August I don't doubt our swimmers have trained hard, but when I see the likes of Alan Campbell, Mark Hunter and George Nash puking their rings out after burying themselves in their rowing finals, then comparing them with our swimmers telling Sharron Davies how pleased they were with fifth place, seconds after leaving the pool, I wonder....? 3rd August Cheers Adrian Moorhouse and Andy Jameson. Rebecca Adlington and Lotte Friis. The only two women in the world to finish 3rd and 5th in a two horse race. 3 August Rightly, there's been a lot of attention today to our Women's Double in the Rowing, most of it centred on Kath Grainger Both women are fantastic athletes and if you are dumb enough to look to sports stars for role models, well they're that too. However, Katherine has been the heart and soul of British Women's rowing for a generation now and that plus her three Olympic silvers was always going to make her the centre of any Gold medal story. I'm just pleased and proud there was a story to write. Would love Sophie Hosking and Kat Copeland to do some damage in the LW Sculls tomorrow and really put GB Women's rowing on the map.  1 August Big 'if' but if the Rowers do well at these games, we should secure some serious funding for the sport for the next four years. One hopes Siemens stay on board too as a major corporate sponsor. I'd like to see a huge talent recruitment drive in the inner cities. Massive generalisation and stereotyping coming up but take some of those 6ft plus basketballers and do some basic morphology and somatoptype testing and put them into clubs like London, Molesey, Tideway Scullers etc and Lea in the East End. Okay, it's a pipedream at present but you'd have to hope that something like this is on GB Rowing's agenda. Look at someone like Mo Sbihi, the big Muslim guy in the middle of the British Eight. He was a basketball player before World Class Start talent spotting got hold of him - look at what he's achieved. 29 July Re Tom Daley getting abuse on Twitter I'm of the view, that the kind of individual who uses that internet as a dojo would pose very little threat in the real world. Leaving the house would be a problem for most and if any of them did make it as far as my door I would force them to speak to a female. Job done. 29 July Went to the Rowing today Park and ride from Maidenhead to Windsor Racecourse, then a 40 minute walk to Dorney and our seats. Superbly organised. Took our own food and drank plenty of water beforehand so can't comment on price / ease of getting food other than to say if you didn't like it then you should have done it yourself as we did. Atmosphere fantastic. Gamesmakers very professional as you would expect from British volunteers. Knew the basics - where things were, how to get there etc - and were pleasant and welcoming. Before and between races there was plenty to see on the multiplicity of big screens. GB Rowing also had a 'come and try' tent with ergos for kids to have a go on. I hope they were taking names and adresses for a follow up direct mail / e-mail campaign, or at least giving out promotional literature to anyone interested. Seats were all sold, crowd were loud and sporting - after the Brit wins, the biggest cheer was for the single sculler from Niger who trailed in 2 minutes after everyone else. He was interviewed later and admitted he'd only taken the sport up 3 months ago. Got one of the biggest cheers of the day. A fantastic day out and great to be able to be part of our Olympics  28 July If you are watching on TV, turn off the commentary and (wait for it) turn on Alan Green, Martin Cross and James Cracknell on the radio. Dan Topiolski and Garry Herbert are absolute dogshit. They simply get even basic facts wrong. For God's sake DO NOT BET ON ANYTHING THEY SAY IN COMMENTARY. Seriously - they are that bad! Otherwise, Murray and Bond were just awesome  in the Mens Pair. A World Best time - put your house on them to win, but Our boys Nash and Satch are right in the mix for even silver now (and I had them as possible bronzes before the regatta). Our Mens Eight will come on for another race in the repechage. Silver I reckon - the Germans are too classy but America are show-ponies. They were sucking wind at the end of their heat. Our Women's Pair were so smooth and got us off to a flyer, Nothing's ever nailed on but.... Our Women's quad are out - ruined by injuries basically. The rest were as expected pretty much Tomorrow I'll be there and it's like the eve of Cheltenham for me now! 28 July In 2008, China chose a girl to sing at the Olympic opening ceremony. Then told her that she wasn't pretty enough to be seen, and had another girl mime. In 2012, British ignored the convention of choosing legendary Olympians or statesman, and let some kids do it. Never should a nation be more proud

Is London Ready?

This entry is as factual an account as possible of what I did on Tuesday 25th July.

It is written in an attempt to address the negativity there is from some quarters, about the Olympic Games, from their costs, to the degree of disruption Londoners especially will face, to the commercialisation of the Games, to the security blanket under which they operate.

Train into London from the Northern Home Counties. It was delayed in arriving at my station and then delayed on arrival in West London, due apparently to 'debris on overhead power lines'

Cost:  £38.60 for two off-peak adult return fares and one-day Travelcards for Central London. Parking cost £6.20 for the day.

Bought a sausage baguette, a vegetable samosa and 2 cups of coffee, take away (oh the high life!)

Cost:  £8.10

Travelled across London on the Central Line to Mile End then changed to the District Line to get to Bromley-by-Bow. This was done in about 30 minutes with no delay, seated all the way and for me, rather worryingly uncrowded; I was expecting many more people to be heading out towards the Olympic Park only three days before the opening ceremony

Met up with a Blue Badge Guided Tour around the perimiter of the Olympic facilities. This was pre-booked a day before at http://www.toursof2012sites.com/ and would be my second such tour, the previous one being in May of this year. It represents an opportunity to see, as close as possible within the constraints of the Olympic security programme, the facilities at the Olympic Park.

The tour began with a walk through Three Mills Island and alongside the River Lea, to the south of the Olympic Park. There has clearly been significant re-generation of this area and the guide also explained the level of clearing work that has had to be undertaken in this area to leech out the heavy metals poisoning the soil due to centuries of industrial pollution, before an Olympic brick could be laid. The River Lea had substantial sized fish in (Carp I was told), indicating a level of cleanliness capable of supporting life beyond algae. However, there were also unsightly mounds of Tesco's bags and detritus from picnics around the path of the walk.

Notwithstanding the significant and very visible new-bulid flats and offices, including the cleaning of the art-deco Yardleys bulding on Stratford High Street, there was also a substantial level of less-saloubrious (obviously) social housing on the walk.

There was a visible, but low-key security presence oserveable comprising green-shirted private contractors, Police and Army personnel.

Our tour guide was extremely knowledgeable and engaging about his brief. He was clearly pro-Olympics, however, when asked by a young boy in our party of 15 'why companies who make things that are bad for you, like McDonalds and Coca Cola' he said such questions should be better addressed to the Olympic authority, but pointed out that the tier 1-3 sponsors such as the aforementioned contributed £1bn to the Games, which was £1bn that did not come out of the taxpayers pocket.

He also admitted that Londoners have had to pay c. £300 extra in Council Tax to help put on the Games, but that he, as a Londoner, did not mind this.

Sticking to my brief to remain as factual as possible, I will not give my thoughts on the facilities at The Olympic Park / Village, beyond saying they looked ready from a distance of about 1/2 mile, but were in total security lockdown.

Very visible branding activity, including large coverage of several tower blocks by Adidas and Gillette among others, bit nothing visible, in accordance with the Olympic charter, within the Park facility itself.

Cost of walking tour: £18 for two adults, for c.90 minute tour.

Left Stratford station after listening to much cheering, flag-waving and bonhomie from members of the Mexican team and their supporters with whom many of the crowd at Westfield Shopping Centre were having their pictures taken. Overheard one local resident complaining about TV people making noise at 1.30 in the morning outside her house and that her car parking spaces were taken by media personnel.

Went to Tower Hill tube station and walked across Tower Bridge, along the embankment to London Bridge Station.

Plenty of tourists visable but no more than usual for a sunny day in an attractions-heavy part of the Capital. Ver noticeable clean-up operation taking place on the Bridge itself and in fact throughout the day one was aware of a higher-than-expected volume of litter pickers and cleaners working thoughot the Capital.

Saw the huge Olympic Rings suspended from the overhead walkway on Tower Bridge. Plenty of pictures being taken with this as a backdrop, by tourists of all nations. Also saw the construction of a very impressive outdoor photo exhibition by Tom Stoddart, on the walk to London Bridge.

Lunch of two rolls and two orange juices.

Cost of Lunch: £10 total.

Tube from London Bridge to Westminster. Sat down all the way.

Walked from Westminster Tube up Whitehall with the merest glimpse of the Beach Volleyball arena on Horseguards Parade. Entry was guarded by soldiers from the Rifles, who confirmed they had been given this task over 6 months ago and therefore were not part of the emergency call up of armed forces personnel as a result of the G4S shortfall.

Walked round Trafalgar Square, down Pall Mall, down Picadilly to Hyde Park. Into Hyde Park to see the Serpentine, venue for the Long-Distance Swimming and Triathlon events. Plenty of waterborne craft still on the lake but the towpath on the North of the Serpentine was closed for security reasons. The facility looked ready, to this untutored eye, if somewhat warm and sludgy (read 'unhealthy') for swimming. I hope competitors have had their injections.

Bought ice creams and drinks.

Cost: £7.75

Walked down Knightsbridge to see the window display in Harrods. No Olympic themes there however, in keeping with most of the streets of Central London, bunting, Union Jacks, Olympic and 'Team GB' paraphenalia were very much on display.

Grabbed a beer and a diet coke in a pub in Knightsbridge

Cost:  £6.80

Back to Euston on the Underground at 7.00 p.m and was unable to sit on what was a hot and uncomfortable train.

Baguette and orange juice at Euston.

Cost: £5.79

Homeward journey of c.40 minutes with no delays and a seat all the way.

Other than the above itenarary, there was visible security presence of which one was aware all day, especially around the major tourist and government facilities and of course at the Olympic Park. The pink Olympic Venue signage on the Underground and at other transport hubs was excellent and, there appeared to be a high number of people with Olympic Games accreditation throughout the whole of London, not just Stratford, who were enjoying themselves.

I winessed no acts of violence, drunkeness and very little graffiti during the day, however there was one guy openly smoking a joint in Hyde Park, something I have never seen (in public) on any previous visit to London.

Apologies for the very factual nature of this blog - I hope this helps you decide if London is worthy and ready for the self-styled 'Greatest Show on Earth', free from any taint of cheerleading or cynicysm on the Author,s part.

Dark Forces at The Olympics!

London 2012 Olympics: American and Australian team buses get lost from Heathrow to Stratford

That's because the bus drivers took them to Stratford ON AVON.

It's all part of the Black Ops programme Team GB is running on our opponents. Have Brian Blessed, clad only in his tights, declaiming the Prince of Hamlet's speech to them outside the Royal Shakespeare Theatre, at Krakatoa volumes.

Yeah! Deal with THAT Usain Bolt!!

Olympic Rowing Preview

The rowing events at the Olympic Games will be held at Dorney Lake near Windsor,  If you are watching the events live, it promises to be a fiesta like no other, but for many, it will be a case of settling down in front of the TV, with this preview to provide visionary insights / comedic mis-predictions (delete as appropriate post-Games, when hindsight is everything).

If you’re going to bluff your way through the rowing, there a few fundamentals to understand.

There are two types of rowing. ‘Sweeping’ where crew members have one blade (note that ‘blade’ there. Never an ‘oar’, got it?) and ‘Sculling’ where they have two. Then there are ‘Lightweight’ events, where the average and total weight of crews must not exceed strict parameters and the stroke-rate (number of strokes per minute) is much higher than their Heavyweight counterparts. Finally of course there are Men’s and Women’s events.

Thankfully, it’s an easy sport to understand. Typically six nations will race each other over a straight 2,000 metres, in heats, followed by repechages (for the higher-placed losers in the heats) followed by finals (or by quarter finals and semi finals in some events) where the medals are decided. There are certain tactical nuances to races, but by and large, most crews will aim to establish an early lead and then hang on for grim death.

And finally, with Tug Of War consigned to Olympic history, Rowing and (stretching a point), the High Jump are the only events where the competitors travel backwards to victory!

A quick look through the runners and riders then for each of the 14 events, with an emphasis on the British challengers, since Rowing is a sport where ‘Team GB’ can expect a decent medal haul. Performance Director David Tanner has challenged our oarsmen to better the six medals that saw Great Britain top the rowing medals table in Beijing and on home water and with excellent funding from Siemens and the National Lottery, this is a realistic objective.

Men’s Eight (Final: Wednesday 1^st August)

The ‘Blue Ribbon’ event of the regatta, in which, up until the final World Cup event in Munich in June, Britain could reasonably have expected to be on the podium. However, the British crew well and truly fluffed their lines in Germany, trailing home third behind Australia and the surprise winners Poland. This race was without the all-conquering German Eight and would have sent our crew off to their pre-games camp with plenty to think about, not least the composition of the crew – they were missing young hotshot Constantine Louloudis in all three of the World Cup events, due to injury - and the order (who will row in what position in the boat?) Louloudis is back for London and should add power but this will be the first regatta at which the full-strength GB Eight will have rowed together and it’s asking a lot for them to gel quickly. One hopes their time at camp has seen them generate a rhythm to add to their undoubted strength. It will still be a huge ‘ask’ to see them overhaul the favourites Germany (in their fearsome green boat) and the USA and Canada will not be far away either.

Women’s Pair (Final: Wednesday 1^st August)

We may well see history made in this event as Heather Stanning and Helen Glover are the favourites to become Britain’s first Women’s Olympic Rowing gold medallists. They have carried all before them this season after just being pipped for Gold by New Zealand in the World Championships last autumn. They have come back stronger, worked on their technique under Coach Robin Williams and have seen off challenges from the USA and then a morale-boosting win over their nemesis, New Zealand in Munich. Both the latter crews will be competitive and Romania always throw in at least one ‘where did they come from?’ performance – but this is GB’s to lose.

Women’s Quadruple Sculls (Final: Wednesday 1^st August).

Four women, each using two blades, remember? The Quad is the most beautiful boat to watch when everything is in harmony. Power? Yes, for sure – you’re nothing without the miles on the ergo through the winter to build strength, but the precision and ‘swing’ of a perfectly honed Quad is the stuff better men then me write poetry about. The GB Quad have been borderline competitive this season, but injury has meant a shuffling of the line up and whilst Fran Houghton and Debbie Flood survive from the crew that won silver in Beijing, a similar result in London would be a huge achievement. This should develop into a shootout between Ukraine and Germany.

Men’s Double Sculls (Final: Thursday 2^nd August).

After a surprise second place in the first World Cup regatta in Belgrade, GB’s Bill Lucas and Sam Townsend have subsequently been put in their place at Lucerne (6^th) and in Munich where they went ‘eyeballs out’ holding second place through 1500 metres before fading into fourth behind Norway, New Zealand and Germany. One would be putting a lot of faith in the enervating power of home water to see them holding on and bettering this position at Dorney. Watch out for the bow rower in the Norwegian boat. Long hair and a celebration style more over the top than the First World War, if they grab a medal!

Men’s Lightweight Four (Final: Thursday 2^nd August).

The first Lightweight final and a noticeable difference in technique. What lightweights lack in raw strength, they make up for in a higher stroke rate than their heavyweight counterparts. It’ll look like threshing machine, will be desperately close but GB go into this with real hopes of a Gold. Our crew of the Chambers brothers, Chris Bartley and Rob Williams produced a flawless performance in Munich, winning by over two seconds, which is an eternity in Lightweight rowing. Denmark and Australia will challenge hard and China are very much a live but largely unknown quantity however Britain should fear no one.

Women’s Eight (Final: Thursday 2^nd August).

A bronze medal in last year’s World Championship set a marker for the GB Eight in 2012 and they’ve been just around that level in the key international regattas this season. The Dutch have been disappointing so it’s a question of how to find speed to get in amongst the powerhouses of Canada, USA and Romania? Stroke Victoria Thornley has switched from the Women’s Quad back to sweep rowing and this is an experienced boat, boasting Olympic silver medallist Annabel Vernon and a host of Beijing Olympians. A boat then that home advantage can propel to the medal podium. The talent is there.

Men’s Single Sculls (Final: Friday 3^rd August)

If Ulsterman Alan Campbell can pace his race correctly, he can come away with something shiny. It’s asking a lot for him to beat Mahe Drysdale (NZ) and Ondrej Synek (CZK). Olaf Tufte (NOR) is a fearsome Olympian, who does very little between Games but is always at concert-pitch for the ‘big un’ whilst Marcel Hacker (GER) won impressively in Munich. There is also a dark horse in the shape of Cuban Angel Rodriguez in what promises to be one of the most competitive events at Dorney as well as one of the most compelling. Six athletes, on their own, with no one to rely on, blame or share the brickbats and plaudits with. Competitive sport at its rawest and not to be missed!

Men’s Pair (Final: Friday 3^rd August)

If New Zealand don’t win this, it will be the biggest surprise since the Captain of the Titanic said ‘What iceberg?’ In such an eventuality Hamish Bond and Eric Murray will be forced to row back home themselves. Utterly dominant throughout the four year Olympiad, they have forced Great Britain’s Andy Triggs-Hodge and Pete Reed back into the GB Four – and the British pair were their closest rivals at last year’s World Championships. At Dorney, GB will be represented by the youth of George Nash and Will Satch. They will give a good account of themselves but if it’s anything other than New Zealand first, fresh air second it will be one of the shocks of the regatta. Scrub that; the whole Olympics.

Men’s Quadruple Sculls (Final: Friday 3^rd August)

The Leander Club threesome of Matt Wells, Tom Solesbury and Stephen Rowbotham are joined by Reading University’s Charles Cousins, but they face probably the toughest challenge of all the GB crews. After failing to make the Final in the World Championships last season, our Quad has once again been found wanting for speed against the likes of Croatia, Germany, Australia and Italy and Estonia and it is unrealistic to expect a wholesale reversal of fortunes  in London.

Women’s Double Sculls (Final: Friday 3^rd August)

This could be another one of the stories of the Games. Thirty Six year old Katherine Grainger has won a silver medal in the last three Olympics, the last of these in heartbreaking fashion in Beijing when the Quad was overhauled by the Chinese crew within sight of the finish. This time around, she is in the Double with Anna Watkins and they go to the Games as favourites, following their unbeaten record this season. The biggest barrier to this piece of British Olympic history could be a piece of Australian Olympic history as Kim Crow will attempt to win two Golds, here, with her partner Brooke Pratley  and in the Single Sculls, a schedule which will guarantee Ms Crow a minimum of six races over eight days. It should be the first of two GB vs. Australia showdowns (more of which next) with Poland in the medal mix too.

Men’s Four (Final: Saturday 4^th August)

Likely to be the second great GB vs. Australia clash (with all respect to Greece, Germany and Belarus), with great storylines abounding if either of these countries win. Britain have made the Four their number one boat, changing last year’s World Championship winning crew to accommodate Pete Reed and Andy Triggs-Hodge, chastened after their year as a Pair perpetually following home the mighty New Zealanders. The GB coach Jurgen Grobeler has overseen a crew to victory at every Games since 1972 and will not expect that sequence to end at Dorney. Given the priority this boat has received in the GB hierarchy, coming second is not an option, however there is a very real chance of this since the Brits will be facing an Australian Four containing Drew Ginn. This phenomenal athlete will be aiming for his fourth Olympic Gold (he’s also posted world class performances as a cycling time trialist in 2010, when he took a year away from the water.) His crew beat the GB Four in Munich in June, where their superior technique trumped the raw power of Reed, Triggs-Hodge, Alex Gregory and Tom James. For many, this will be THE event of the 2012 Olympic regatta.

Men’s Lightweight Double Sculls (Final: Saturday 4^th August)

Reigning Olympic Champions Zac Purchase and Mark Hunter are set to defend their title on home water and their Championship-winning pedigree puts them in with a chance of achieving this; however it has been a far from smooth journey this season. After winning the World Championships last September, any thoughts of the Olympics being a rubber-stamping exercise were dashed by heavy defeats in the Lucerne and Munich World Cup events this season. The Britain’s have the know-how and desire to turn things around but sharks, in the shape of New Zealand, France, Italy and Denmark, smell blood.

Women’s Single Sculls (Final: Saturday 4^th August)

From a partisan perspective, time to put your feet up and enjoy a brew or something stronger, as GB have not qualified a boat for this event. Ekatarina Karsten from Belarus turned 40 in June and will go off favourite to add a further Olympic gold to the two she already has, following an eight year hiatus which saw her take silver in 2004 and bronze in 2008. Another heroic story beckons therefore but Kim Crow of Australia (see earlier), Xiuyun Zhang (China) and Emma Twigg (New Zealand) will be out to ruin the Belarus party. If we are to claim an ‘athlete-by-proxy’ for GB then Mirka Knapkova of the Czech Republic spent much of 2010 and 2011 training in Henley and won the Princess Royal Challenge Cup at the Henley Regatta in both these years – as British as Fish and Chips then! She should be competitive at Dorney.

Women’s Lightweight Double Sculls (Final: Saturday 4^th August)

Following their bronze in the World Championships last year, Hester Goodsell retired and crewmate Sophie Hosking has teamed up with new partner Kat Copeland. An encouraging second place in the opening World Cup event in Belgrade was followed by more sobering fifth and fourth places at Lucerne and Munich. It would be foolish to put a line through them for a medal at London, but China, New Zealand, Denmark and Greece hold stronger claims based on their performances this season.

None of the athletes highlighted in this preview are millionaires. None will kiss the Union Jack on the winner’s podium then demand a pay rise the next day. None will fall out of a nightclub, drunk, on the arms of a pneumatic starlet / thick-as-mince hunk, and be splashed all over the Fleet Street redtops. 

They are, by and large, approachable, utterly dedicated, possess an ‘off the scale’ level of fitness and will put on a hell of a show in a little piece of Buckinghamshire in these next few weeks.

More 'over the top' than World War One

MELBOURNE could host a homecoming parade for champion racehorse Black Caviar.

The Baillieu Government is in talks with management of the mighty mare about throwing a welcome home party through city streets.

The event could be staged in as little as two weeks once Black Caviar, who landed back in Melbourne today, clears quarantine


And the Aussies had the nerve to rib us about giving Paul Collingwood an OBE for one appearance in the 2005 Ashes series!

Imagine what they'll do for a real sporting superstar like Drew Ginn.

Spontaneously combust I imagine