Saturday, 9 June 2012

'WHAT DRAMA HERE I FANCY!'

It's great there’s no Motty in the BBC commentary box anymore

Superannuated old bampot! Should have been put out to graze ages ago. We’re all supposed to love him because he’s some kind of backbone of the sporting firmament and the viewing public are this jittery mass of neuroses, which somehow need the emollient that only a welter of his soothing statistics can provide.

Well to hell with that nonsense. 



We suffered him for years, breaking open the poppers and the Kleenex if England so much as wins a throw in. Belming away like a total Joey when he gets an opportunity to trot out some dusty old stat that he’s discovered in the fag end of the Internet the night before, when he’s been doing his homework like the retard swot we all secretly suspect him to be.

It’s time for one of the little nobodies – maybe a Guy Mowbray, who knows – to step into the sunshine and commentate their genitals off.

Just as long as the BBC don’t get it into their heads to stick Alan Green on the box.

I doubt the Polish and Ukrainian building industry have constructed tungsten re-enforced gantries to deal with the combined weight of his adipose tissue and his ego. A whole month of his sneering diatribes against officialdom is more than flesh and blood can stand. Green gets every decision right by the way, even from a minimum of 30 yards distance, his peevish sarcasm usually ending with the word ‘Shocking!’ spat out as if to brook no argument from his audience or co-commentators.

A whip round for Jimmy Armfield to reward him for slotting Green, next time he goes off on one. I'm in for a tenner. Are you with me?

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